Playing Doctors and Nurses…

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Dr Nofugginidea

Every once in a while, life throws you a little curve ball. Today was one of them.

We were enjoying a juice in the retreat restaurant, when an Australian mother rocked up with her little seven-year-old, who was in a great deal of distress with chronic intestinal pains. The poor little girl could barely walk she was in so much pain.

After cutting their stay early at another Yoga retreat she was recommended to see the colonic lady at our retreat…unfortunately she was fully booked out though and there wasn’t much she could do anyhow, as the colonic machine isn’t safe for children.

A brief discussion with mum and we could see and feel that her descending (left side) colon had blocked off and was completely rock hard. She was also experiencing pain in her ascending (right side) colon as she hadn’t been to the toilet properly for a good four or five days.

Enough’s enough I thought… I gave her a capsule of cascara sagrada, which is a pretty strong herbal diuretic that moves the most stubborn of constipation. Not ideal for a 25kg kid’s intestines, but hey with the amount of pain she was in, I wasn’t hesitating.

I also suggested that I also had a spare enema bag that we could use that wouldn’t be too intrusive for the little girl. After that, mum became nurse, as I demonstrated to her how to use the enema bag. As the little girl wriggled on the bed uncomfortably, mumsy did the deed, while I held the bag in the air, making sure that the water flowed out properly.

First enema, the little girl only released water. Second time, no luck again. I was starting to get a little worried as normally the enema works first go. Thank god the third time lucky worked a treat and she finally released some of the blockage. The pain reduced immediately and she was back to being a happy little kid. A bit later some more sharp pains, another big release and she was feeling even better again.

Mission complete. A great team effort!

After sipping on a mango juice and some water a grateful mum and daughter were on their way for a bit of last-minute shopping before heading to the airport.

As they were leaving I asked the little girl if she needed to go the toilet one more time before she left.

“What would happen if you needed to go in the car”, I joked.

 

“Don’t worry the car has air-conditioning”, she replied with total sincerity.

You gotta love kids!

It’s a good feeling to know that from all my pain and suffering I have actually learned a bit of medical common sense that can actually be beneficial to others. I might not be a doctor or a nurse, but I do have some clue.

Funny that the Balinese doctor who first visited their hotel, sent the little girl away with a pocket full of antibiotics that she promptly vomited straight back up. The antibiotics were supposedly for a urinary infection that he diagnosed on top of the constipation. Hey don’t worry about giving her something to alleviate her chronic constipation! Gee Whiz! I’m pretty sure the ‘urinary infection’ was just the ballooned bowel putting pressure on the bladder.

My faith in the mainstream medical world and a lot of its methods becomes less and less by the day. The world is waking up… the dodgy dealings, prescription kickbacks, Ineffective procedures and incompetent practitioners can’t be hidden for too much longer. It’s time to bring back some common sense!

The brave new world is coming and It can’t come bloody quick enough.

Jordan

My Hair is Growing Back Again

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Howdy everyone,

My thinning hair has been an on and off thing ever since I first got sick all those years ago. At first it was a big thing being a young bloke…. “no one likes a baldie” – a female housemate once declared to me. it’s not true :) . I watched my hair slowly thin to the point where my hair had a very noticeable thin spot at the front centre of my hair and also a little in the direct top of my scalp (traditional male pattern baldness). When my hair was wet it was especially noticeable.

I kind of grew used to the idea that I was going to join the chrome dome club, so one Christmas I admitted defeat and shaved my head on a number zero…Bruce Willis bald I went. No big deal really. I had accepted…BUT then miraculously my hair grew back. And that was the start of the cycle of shedding and growing back hair as my body went through healthier stages and bad acidic detox stages when I ate the wrong foods at certain times.

Right now I’m going through one of those stages where my hair it is thickening right up. It’s to the point where if i was to look into the mirror right now, I’d almost think I was crazy for ever even thinking I was going bald.  It’s quite amazing really.

I have a female friend with chrons disease and another mate who suffered from colitis and ended up getting a section of his bowel removed. Both suffered from noticeable hair thinning. I’m sure malabsorbtion would be a contributing factor in these cases and maybe ours too.

So what’s making my hair grow back? I don’t think it’s one thing, but a number of things all contributing. After my recent eight-day juice-fast and serious of colonics, my bowel is currently cleaned out and my system isn’t overly acidic. My colon will be absorbing vitamins and minerals much more efficiently now that it isn’t backed up with tons of old feces and toxins.

The significance of the lymphatic system has been a recent discovery for me and I believe there is a strong connection between my improved lymphatic system and the thickening of my hair. My lymph node in my groin has improved so much since I had those two massages to release the painful stagnation in the nodes. My left groin was particularly swollen and painful. The left side is always my body’s ‘Achilles heal’.. I normally have problems with my descending colon (left side). The deep tissue massage has emptied a lot of poisons and the groin is no longer crazy tender. The body is cleaner and draining toxic poisons better which means the blood is more pure and is circulating more efficiently and will more effectively nourishing my hair follicles.

The lymphatic system job is to remove waste and byproducts from the blood while regulating the immune system. It acts as the body’s drainage system, when it is congested the body will start to let us know. For me, my body shows me through pains in my glands, pins and needles and/or slight swelling in both legs. The best way to combat a stagnant lymphatic system is through exercise and massage. The more strenuous the exercise the better…Trampoline rebounding is said to be great to get the lymph fluids flowing. There is also special technique for massaging the lymphatic system which is very helpful (watch the video below).

Eating an alkaline diet and ensuring your bowels move daily will put less pressure on the kidneys and other eliminative organs, consequentially your lymphatic system will not have to pick up the slack. Beetroot is a great detoxifier of the lymphatic system so put it in your salads and juices.

Another thing that could also be contributing to the hair growth is all the scalp massages I’ve been getting in Bali. Massaging the scalp can stimulate the blood flow to the hair follicles causing the hair to grow thicker and stronger. This can work very effectively for some people but needs to be done consistently for a month or two to see proper results. For those willing to experiment, cayenne pepper rubbed topically on your scalp is said to help to stimulate hair growth for some people. If the hair on your head is completely gone it’s much harder to regrow, but I have heard of it happening.

Anyone else been shedding and then growing hair a bit like a cat?

Jordan

 

Juice Fast: Day 8 Colonics and Rock n Roll

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Howdy,

I think it would be safe to say that Leslie is the only colon hydrotherapist in the world who cranks the Rolling Stones or Metallica for background music during an appointment. Ten points for originality.

Well I have officially broken my fast with a plate of papaya before lunch and then a small salad for dinner. A little disappointed to not be going the whole hog as I was in total cruise mode and it was getting easier every day. But like Leslie said you just gotta do the things you love. So here I am in seedy old party town Kuta for a night before being picked up for the two hour speedboat to Java. Should be in the surf by 10am. The forecast looks unbelievable. Should be a memorable trip.

Once again I think it’s much more informative and entertaining to let Leslie’s words do the talking. Below are some quotes from today’s appointment.

“I don’t like that stuff, it’s fu$kin rabbit food if you ask me” (in reference to eating lettuce).

Your passing dark stuff looks like burnt lasagna that sticks to the wall of the colon.

That was a huge 40cm block -solid block – that you just passed.There’s not many that pass anything the size of that.

That’s fermentation. You’ve got two lots of fermentation and that one’s got Candida in them tainted with particles.

All that stuff has been harbouring in your guts for a long time.

It’s been in there for too long, it’s black.

Looked like the branch of a tree that bastard.

That’s Candida city, I’m pretty confident to tell you it’s candida.

I think you get the picture from Leslie’s observations. I’m still passing a bunch of crap. We have passed quite a lot in two sessions but I’ll need to go back for more to clean myself fully out.

In conclusion, whenever I do a juice fast with colonics It’s always easy to see why I have so many problems. I’m literally chocked full of it. Whether it’s eating foods I can’t digest or overeating in general. The same result occurs if I continue to eat my trouble foods – foods that contain Iactose and/or sucrose). This is a sure fire way to sustain a clogged up over polluted colon that harbours candida and other parasites which produce toxins and toxic gases that end up in the blood stream.

I always finish the fast a much happier person and its totally clear to me, that all the toxins in my system definitely effect my moods, concentration, memory and many other body functions. IMO people who have no or limited success, only struggle because the colonics are NECESSARY to get out all the toxic waste that has built up over the years. A healthy colon will normally only require about three colonic sessions for a full clean out, while someone like me requires between 6-10 sessions normally…Sometimes more. It really is unbelievable. Try it and you’ll see for yourself.

How’s things with you Belle.

I have managed to source two big x 1.5 litre lethal green juices to take with me, so I’ll be able to drink some juice while I’m away. I think on my return I’ll try for a 3 or 4 day water fast if you might be interested. Good luck for the big 14, you can do it!

Talk soon

Jordan

 

Juice Fast Day 7: Mr Toxic City

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G’day,

Day 7 was a beauty.

This morning’s colonic went really well and I released a massive amount of mucus, candida and old hardened, blocked feces. Leslie said I would have filled three quarters of a bucket full of crap. Crazy! She really has some serious skills as a colonic hydrotherapist and really takes the whole  process to a new level.

She begins with a massage of the colon with sandalwood oil and immediately she is able to pinpoint the blockages that she needs to work on and release. She a lot of little tricks up her sleeve and how’s this for a joke, today’s session went for nearly 2 hours for only AUS $40. Talk about value for money. Since then I have got her 4 more customers from word of mouth, so she is happy!

Nearly everything that comes out of Leslie’s mouth is pure Australian gold.  I thought I’d take some notes today and let you guy’s hear them for yourself. F bombs have been excluded as they normally occurred every 30 seconds :)

Mr toxic city you are

It’s like driving down a freeway with lots of speed-bumps, the gases and blockages are the bumps

Its like bank vault doors and the gas gets trapped. You need to keep knocking the doors down.

How good is good bacteria if you mix it with bad bacteria. You need to get it all out and give yourself a new playing field.

I’m just watering the garden (in referral to slowly starting the colonic process to weaken the old stuff)

Your getting out a hell of a lot gases and a hell of a lot toxins.

Never a dull moment with our Leslie.

She also told a story of a girl with bipolar who passed what she described as ‘the biggest thing I have ever seen’. This lady passed a one metre long dark black thing which was a huge clump of parasites and whatever else after doing a water fast. The lady was able to get off all her medication after the cleanse. It makes sense since 80% of the body’s serotonin is stored in the gut.

A tip she also gave me was to make my own immune booster capsules by mixing equal parts of sodium sorbate (vitamin C) and turmeric in some vegetable capsules. Take 3 pills at night and 3 in the morning. Vitamin C is best absorbed in the evening when the body has slowed down.

Besides the colonic I didn’t really get up to too much besides some deep breathing in my room. I think just hanging out with others and socialising is all part of the healing for me. So in that aspect it’s also been good.

Ok now for the bad news and I really hope I don’t dissapoint you too much Belle. But I’m not sure if I’m going to be able to make the whole 14 days as I’m going to shoot to Java on Friday to chase the swell of swells. The sensible part ad the fun part of my brain have been battling each other non stop the last two days..but in the end I think I would kick myself if I missed what could be the best swell of the last five years.

I’m sorry to be such a bad allie Belle. Surfers are unreliable, that’s all I will say. Never marry one!! Anyhow, I will however be juicing for two more days so will still get to day 9 and possibly even day 10. It’s just going to be impossible to juice in Java as it’s just a small surf camp in the middle of the jungle. I will take a couple of big juices on the trip though and I’m going to endeavour to to see if I can get some vegetables juices or maybe I will even resort to coconut water. I’ll see what is going to be possible. Either way I’m going to have Internet access so I’ll check in every night to make sure you are motivated to keep going. I hope you will keep charging. I’m actually feeling so full of energy right now that I think I could fast for weeks on end. It will be a shame to stop, but as soon as I’m back in Bali ( only in Java for 6 days) I reckon I’ll get straight back into the juicing again.

I hope things are good, you’ll feel so much better after a colonic. I’m feeling so much better after getting all that crap out from today. Colonics really are needed. Keep up the good work and yep I agree this one has gone super fast. I think one day I’ll def do a month long fast like my Canadian friend is doing.

Talk soon

Jordan